// <XMP>
//(c)Bartificer Web Design 2000
//Created by Bart Busschots - http://www.voyager.8m.net
//This script may be used by any one as long as this comment is left in place

//setting up data structures to store the quotes & inserting the quotes
//do not remove this code
var Quotes=new Array();
var catNames=new Array();
var QCount = new Array();

function addCategory(catName, catNum){
  Quotes[catNum]=new Array();
  catNames[catNum] = catName;
  QCount[catNum] = 0;
}

function addQuote(cat, theQuote){
  Quotes[cat][QCount[cat]] = theQuote;
  QCount[cat]++;
}

function getRandQuote(){
	var a = Math.round(Math.random()*10000);
	var rand1 = a%Quotes.length;
	var b = Math.round(Math.random()*10000);
	var rand2=0;

	rand2=b%Quotes[rand1].length;

	return Quotes[rand1][rand2];
}


//add your quotes below this line
/////////////////////////////////

//Simpsons Quotes
addCategory("Simpsons", 0);
addQuote(0, "<I>\"To alcohol! The cause of... and solution to all of life's problems!\"</I> <NOBR>- Homer J Simpson</NOBR>");
addQuote(0, "<I>\"To think I turned to a cult when all this time I had true happiness....beer!!!\"</I> <NOBR>- Homer J Simpson</NOBR>");
addQuote(0, "<I>\"You'll have to speak up, I'm wearing a towel\"</I> <NOBR>- Homer Jay Simpson (On the Phone)</NOBR>");
addQuote(0, "<I>\"Facts are meaningless, you can use facts to prove anything that's remotely true!\"</I> <NOBR>- Homer J Simpson</NOBR>");
addQuote(0, "<I>\"Lisa, just because I don't care doesn't mean I don't understand\"</I> <NOBR>- Homer J Simpson</NOBR>");
addQuote(0, "<I>\"To start press any key. Where's the 'Any' key?\"</I> <NOBR>- Homer J Simpson</NOBR> (reading a computer manual)");
addQuote(0, "<I>\"America's health care system is second only to Japan... Canada, Sweden, Great Britain, ... well all of Europe. But you can thank your lucky stars we don't live in Paraguay\"</I> <NOBR>- Homer J Simpson</NOBR>");
addQuote(0, "<B>Lionel Hutz:</B> <I>The judge doesn't like me ever since I sorta ran over his dog</I><BR><B>Marge:</B> <I>You ran over his dog?</I><BR><B>Lionel Hutz:</B> <I>Well ... if you replace dog with son and sorta with repeatedly</I>");
addQuote(0, "<I>\"Now son, you don't want to drink beer. That's for Daddies, and kids with fake IDs\"</I> <NOBR>- Homer J Simpson</NOBR>");
addQuote(0, "<I>\"Marge, don't discourage the boy! Weaseling out of things its important to learn. It's what separates us from the animals! ....Except the weasel\"</I> <NOBR>- Homer J Simpson</NOBR>");
addQuote(0, "<I>\"If you really want something in life you have to work for it. Now quiet, they're about to announce the lottery numbers\"</I> <NOBR>- Homer J Simpson</NOBR>");
addQuote(0, "<I>\"I saw this in a movie about a bus that had to SPEED around a city keeping its SPEED over 50, and if its SPEED changed, it would explode! I think it was called, 'The Bus That Couldn't Slow Down'!\"</I> <NOBR>- Homer J Simpson</NOBR>");
addQuote(0, "<I>\"I want to share something with you - the three sentences that will get you through life. Number one, 'Cover for me' Number two, 'Oh, good idea, boss' Number three, 'It was like that when I got here'\"</I> <NOBR>- Homer J Simpson</NOBR>");
addQuote(0, "<I>\"Marge, you're as pretty as Princess Leia and as smart as Yoda\"</I> <NOBR>- Homer J Simpson</NOBR>");
addQuote(0, "<I>\"Step aside everyone! Sensitive love letters are my specialty. 'Dear Baby, Welcome to Dumpsville. Population: You.'\"</I> <NOBR>- Homer J Simpson</NOBR>");
addQuote(0, "<I>\"Don't let Krusty's death get you down, boy. People die all the time just like that. Why, you could wake up dead tomorrow. Well... good night\"</I> <NOBR>- Homer J Simpson</NOBR>");
addQuote(0, "<I>\"Son, when you participate in sporting events, it's not whether you win or lose, it's how drunk you get\"</I> <NOBR>- Homer J Simpson</NOBR>");
addQuote(0, "<I>\"Lisa, if the Bible has taught us nothing else - and it hasn't - it's that girls should stick to girls' sports, such as hot oil wrestling and foxy boxing and such and such\"</I> <NOBR>- Homer J Simpson</NOBR>");
addQuote(0, "<I>\"Lisa, if you don't like your job, you don't strike. You just go in every day and do it really half-assed. That's the American way\"</I> <NOBR>- Homer J Simpson</NOBR>");
addQuote(0, "<I>\"Stealing! How could you? Haven't you learned anything from that guy who gives those sermons at church? Captain whats-his-name?\"</I> <NOBR>- Homer J Simpson</NOBR>");
addQuote(0, "<I>\"We live in a society of laws. Why do you think I took you to all those Police Academy movies? For fun? Well I didn't hear anybody laughin', did you?\"</I> <NOBR>- Homer J Simpson</NOBR>");
addQuote(0, "<I>\"Maybe, just once, someone will call me 'Sir' without adding, 'You're making a scene'\"</I> <NOBR>- Homer J Simpson</NOBR>");
addQuote(0, "<I>\"...sure, IN theeoory, in theory communism works...\"</I> <NOBR>- Homer J Simpson</NOBR>");
addQuote(0, "<I>\"Oh Lisa! You and your stories! Bart is a vampire! Beer kills brain-cells! Now lets go back to that...building...thingy... where our beds and TV...is\"</I> <NOBR>- Homer J Simpson</NOBR>");
addQuote(0, "<I>\"Ha ha! Look at this country! 'You are gay'! Ha ha!\"</I> <NOBR>- Homer J Simpson</NOBR> (Looking at Uraguay on a globe)");
addQuote(0, "<B>Homer:</B> <I>Oh! And how is education supposed to make me feel smarter? Besides, every time I learn something new, it pushes some old stuff out of my brain. Remember that time I took a home wine making course and forgot how to drive?</I><BR><B>Marge:</B> <I>That's because you were drunk!</I><BR><B>Homer:</B> <I>And how!</I>");
addQuote(0, "<I>\"Operator! Give me the number for 911!\"</I> <NOBR>- Homer J Simpson</NOBR>");
addQuote(0, "<I>\"Okay, brain. You don't like me, and I don't like you, but let's get through this thing and then I can continue killing you with beer\"</I> <NOBR>- Homer J Simpson</NOBR>");
addQuote(0, "<I>\"Vampires are make believe. Just like Elves, Gremlins, and Eskimoes\"</I> <NOBR>- Homer J Simpson</NOBR>");
addQuote(0, "<I>\"You couldn't fool your mother on the foolingest day of your life if you had an electrified fooling machine\"</I> <NOBR>- Homer J Simpson</NOBR>");
addQuote(0, "<I>\"When will I learn? The answer to life's problems aren't at the bottom of a bottle, they're on TV!\"</I> <NOBR>- Homer J Simpson</NOBR>");
addQuote(0, "<I>\"And Lord, we are especially thankful for nuclear power, the cleanest, safest energy source there is. Except for solar, which is just a pipe dream\"</I> <NOBR>- Homer J Simpson</NOBR>");
addQuote(0, "<I>\"Pffft, English. Who needs that. I'm never going to England\"</I> <NOBR>- Homer J Simpson</NOBR>");
addQuote(0, "<B>Bart:</B> <I>I am through with working. Working is for chumps</I><BR><B>Homer:</B> <I>Son, I'm proud of you. I was twice your age before I figured that out</I>");
addQuote(0, "<I>\"Yeah, you know, boys, a nuclear reactor is a lot like a woman. You just have to read the manual and press the right buttons\"</I> <NOBR>- Homer J Simpson</NOBR>");
addQuote(0, "<I>\"There you go again, always taking someone else's side. Flanders, the water department, God...\"</I> <NOBR>- Homer J Simpson (to Marge)</NOBR>");
addQuote(0, "<B>Lisa:</B> <I>It's awful being a kid. No one listens to you</I><BR><B>Grampa:</B> <I>It's rotten being old. No one listens to you</I><BR><B>Homer:</B> <I>I'm a white male, age 18 to 49. Everyone listens to me -- no matter how dumb my suggestions are</I>");
addQuote(0, "<I>\"The information superhighway showed the average person what some nerd thinks about Star Trek\"</I> <NOBR>- Homer J Simpson</NOBR>");
addQuote(0, "<I>\"Uh, Lisa, the whole reason we have elected officials is so we don't _have_ to think all the time. Just like that rainforest scare a few years back: our officials saw there was a problem and they fixed it, didn't they?\"</I> <NOBR>- Homer J Simpson</NOBR>");
addQuote(0, "<I>\"Lisa! Get in here. In this house, we obey the laws of thermodynamics!\"</I> <NOBR>- Homer J Simpson</NOBR>");
addQuote(0, "<I>\"I hope I didn't brain my damage\"</I> <NOBR>- Homer J Simpson</NOBR>");
addQuote(0, "<I>\"Ooh your powers of deduction are exceptional. I simply can not allow you to waste them here while there are so many crimes going unsolved at this very moment. Go, Go! For the good of the city\"</I> <NOBR>- Comic Book Guy</NOBR>");
addQuote(0, "<I>\"Now i shall return to my comic book store where I dipense the insults rather then absorb them\"</I> <NOBR>- Comic Book Guy</NOBR>");
addQuote(0, "<I>\"Pardon Me Santos if that is your real name, Bart Simpson, but your phony credit card is no good here. Now make like my pants and split\"</I> <NOBR>- Comic Book Guy</NOBR>");
addQuote(0, "<I>\"Dear Lord, the gods have been good to me. As an offering, I present these milk and cookies.  If you wish me to eat them instead, please give me no sign whatsoever... thy bidding will be done (munch munch munch)\"</I> <NOBR>- Homer (Praying)</NOBR>");
addQuote(0, "<I>\"Now, I don't want you to worry, class. These tests will have no effect on your grades. They merely determine your future social status and financial success. If any.\"</I> <NOBR>- Mrs. Krabappel</NOBR>");
addQuote(0, "<I>\"We can go up and down, not side to side or back in time\"</I> <NOBR>- Homer J Simpson</NOBR>, about a Hotairbaloon");
addQuote(0, "<I>\"you have to be sobber to fly ... It's not like driving a car\"</I> <NOBR>- Homer J Simpson</NOBR>");
addQuote(0, "<I>\"I'm Tired of being a wannabe league bowler ... I wannabe a league bowler\"</I> <NOBR>- Homer J Simpson</NOBR>");
addQuote(0, "<I>\"I'm not normally a religious man, but if you're up there, save me, Superman!\"</I> <NOBR>- Homer J Simpson</NOBR>");
addQuote(0, "<I>\"God bless those pagans\"</I> <NOBR>- Homer J Simpson</NOBR>");



//General Quotes
addCategory("Miscellaneous", 1);
addQuote(1, "<I>\"If all the world's a stage, I want to operate the trap door\"</I> <NOBR>- Paul Beatty</NOBR>");
addQuote(1, "<I>\"Nobody goes there anymore; it's too crowded\"</I> <NOBR>- Yogi Berra</NOBR>");
addQuote(1, "<I>\"Of all the Gauls the Belgians were the greatest\"</I> <NOBR>- Julius Ceaser</NOBR>");
addQuote(1, "<I>\"We do not inherit the earth from our ancestors, but borrow it from our children\"</I> <NOBR>- Native American Proverb</NOBR>");
addQuote(1, "<I>\"The only thing necessary for the triumph of evil is for good men to do nothing\"</I> <NOBR>- Edmund Burke</NOBR>");
addQuote(1, "<I>\"For every problem there is one solution which is simple, neat, and wrong\"</I> <NOBR>- H. L. Mencken</NOBR>");
addQuote(1, "<I>\"There is nothing new under the sun, but there are lots of old things we don't know yet\"</I> <NOBR>- Ambrose Bierce</NOBR>");
addQuote(1, "<I>\"The best index to a person's character is <BR>a) how he treats people who can't do him any good and <BR>b) how he treats people who can't fight back.\"</I> <NOBR>- Abigail Van Buren</NOBR>");
addQuote(1, "<I>\"I am returning this otherwise good typing paper to you because someone has printed gibberish all over it and put your name at the top\"</I> <NOBR>- English Professor, Ohio University</NOBR>");
addQuote(1, "<I>\"I appreciate the fact that this draft was done in haste, but some of the sentences that you are sending out in the world to do your work for you are loitering in taverns or asleep beside the highway\"</I> <NOBR>- Dr. Dwight Van de Vate</NOBR>, Professor of Philosophy, University of Tennessee at Knoxville");
addQuote(1, "<I>\"If you think education is expensive, try ignorance\"</I> <NOBR>- Derek Bok, president of Harvard</NOBR>");
addQuote(1, "<I>\"Gauls! We have nothing to fear; except perhaps that the sky may fall on our heads tomorrow. But as we all know, tomorrow never comes!!\"</I> <NOBR>- Adventures of Asterix</NOBR>");
addQuote(1, "<I>\"A copy of the universe is not what is required of art; one of the damned things is ample\"</I> <NOBR>- Rebecca West</NOBR>");
addQuote(1, "<I>\"The human animal differs from the lesser primates in his passion for lists of 'Ten Best'\"</I> <NOBR>- H. Allen Smith</NOBR>");
addQuote(1, "<I>\"Life is too important to take seriously\"</I> <NOBR>- Corky Siegel</NOBR>");
addQuote(1, "<I>\"If we can't fix it, it ain't broke\"</I> <NOBR>- Maintainer's Motto</NOBR>");
addQuote(1, "<I>\"Call on God, but row away from the rocks\"</I> <NOBR>- Indian Proverb</NOBR>");
addQuote(1, "<I>\"Anyone can do any amount of work provided it isn't the work he is supposed to be doing at the moment\"</I> <NOBR>- Robert Benchley</NOBR>");
addQuote(1, "<B>Q:</B> <I>Why do ducks have flat feet?</I><BR><B>A:</B> <I>To stamp out forest fires</I><BR><BR><B>Q:</B> <I>Why do elephants have flat feet?</I><BR><B>A:</B> <I>To stamp out flaming ducks</I>");
addQuote(1, "<I>\"Experience is something you don't get until just after you need it\"</I> <NOBR>- Oliver's Law</NOBR>");
addQuote(1, "<I>\"If you only have a hammer, you tend to see every problem as a nail\"</I> <NOBR>- Maslow</NOBR>");
addQuote(1, "<I>\"If there is no God, who pops up the next Kleenex?\"</I> <NOBR>- Art Hoppe</NOBR>");
addQuote(1, "<I>\"Good-bye. I am leaving because I am bored\"</I> <NOBR>- George Saunders' dying words</NOBR> (The Colonel from KFC)");
addQuote(1, "<I>\"All generalizations are bad\"</I> <NOBR>- R. H. Grenier</NOBR>");
addQuote(1, "<I>\"I wish there were a knob on the TV to turn up the intelligence. There's a knob called 'brightness', but that doesn't work\"</I> <NOBR>- Anonymous</NOBR>");
addQuote(1, "<I>\"When all else fails, read the instructions\"</I> <NOBR>- Cann's Axiom</NOBR>");
addQuote(1, "<I>\"After all is said and done, much is said and little is done\"</I> <NOBR>- Olmstead</NOBR>");
addQuote(1, "<I>\"The sum of the intelligence on the planet is a constant, the population is growing\"</I> <NOBR>- Mr. Cole's Axiom</NOBR>");
addQuote(1, "<I>\"Love is the triumph of imagination over intelligence\"</I> <NOBR>- H. L. Mencken</NOBR>");
addQuote(1, "<I>\"I don't mind going nowhere as long as it's an interesting path\"</I> <NOBR>- Ronald Mabbitt</NOBR>");
addQuote(1, "<I>\"Our scientific growth has outrun our spiritual growth, we have quided missiles and misguided men\"</I> <NOBR>- Martin Luther King</NOBR>");
addQuote(1, "<I>\"Everybody is somebody else's weirdo\"</I> <NOBR>- Dykstra</NOBR>");
addQuote(1, "<I>\"He who cannot agree with his enemies is controlled by them\"</I> <NOBR>- Chinese Proverb</NOBR>");
addQuote(1, "<I>\"We never really grow up, we only learn how to act in public\"</I> <NOBR>- Bryan White</NOBR>");
addQuote(1, "<I>\"All things good to know are difficult to learn\"</I> <NOBR>- Greek Proverb</NOBR>");
addQuote(1, "<I>\"Heaven is an American salary, a Chinese cook, an English house, and a Japanese wife. Hell is defined as having a Chinese salary, an English cook, a Japanese house, and an American wife\"</I> <NOBR>- James H Kabbler III</NOBR>");
addQuote(1, "<I>\"A good sermon should be like a woman's skirt: short enough to arouse interest but long enough to cover the essentials\"</I> <NOBR>- Ronald Knox</NOBR>");
addQuote(1, "<I>\"I know why the sun never sets on the British Empire: God wouldnt trust an englishman in the dark\"</I> <NOBR>- Duncan Spaeth</NOBR>");
addQuote(1, "<I>\"A closed mouth gathers no feet\"</I> <NOBR>- Finster's Law</NOBR>");
addQuote(1, "<I>\"Never attribute to malice that which is adequately explained by stupidity\"</I> <NOBR>- Hanlon's Razor</NOBR>");
addQuote(1, "<I>\"I believe that forgiving them is God's function. Our job is simply to arrange the meeting\"</I> <NOBR>- General Norman Schwartzkopf</NOBR>, when asked whether those who supported the terrorist of Sep. 11 should be forgiven");

//Science Quotes
addCategory("Science", 2);
addQuote(2, "<I>\"Great spirits have always encountered violent opposition from mediocre minds\"</I> <NOBR>- Albert Einstein</NOBR>");
addQuote(2, "<I>\"The cosmic religious experience is the strongest and the noblest driving force behind scientific research\"</I> <NOBR>- Albert Einstein</NOBR>");
addQuote(2, "<I>\"God does not play dice with the universe\"</I> <NOBR>- Albert Einstein</NOBR>");
addQuote(2, "<I>\"Heisenberg was here - or was he?\"</I> <NOBR>- unknown</NOBR>");
addQuote(2, "<I>\"Mathematics may be defined as the subject in which we never know what we are talking about, nor whether what we are saying is true\"</I> <NOBR>- Bertrand Russell</NOBR>");
addQuote(2, "<I>\"There are things that are so serious that you can only joke about them\"</I> <NOBR>- Heisenberg</NOBR>");
addQuote(2, "<I>\"Houston, Tranquillity Base here.  The Eagle has landed\"</I> <NOBR>- Neil Armstrong</NOBR>, the first words transmitted from the Moon");
addQuote(2, "<I>\"I am enough of an artist to draw freely upon my imagination. Imagination is more important than knowledge. Knowledge is limited. Imagination encircles the world\"</I> <NOBR>- Albert Einstein</NOBR>");
addQuote(2, "<I>\"Everything you've learned in school as 'obvious' becomes less and less obvious as you begin to study the universe.  For example, there are no solids in the universe. There's not even a suggestion of a solid. There are no absolute continuums. There are no surfaces. There are no straight lines\"</I> <NOBR>- R. Buckminster Fuller</NOBR>");
addQuote(2, "<I>\"The most exciting phrase to hear in science, the one that heralds new discoveries, is not 'Eureka!' (I found it!) but 'That's funny ...'\"</I> <NOBR>- Isaac Asimov</NOBR>");
addQuote(2, "<I>\"Any sufficiently advanced technology is indistinguishable from magic\"</I> <NOBR>- Arthur C. Clarke</NOBR>");
addQuote(2, "<I>\"In order to make an apple pie from scratch, you must first create the universe\"</I> <NOBR>- Carl Sagan, Cosmos</NOBR>");
addQuote(2, "<I>\"I see the eigenvalue in thine eye, I hear the tender tensor in thy sigh. Bernoulli would have been content to die Had he but known such a-squared cos 2(phi)!\"</I> <NOBR>- Stanislaw Lem, 'Cyberiad'</NOBR>");
addQuote(2, "<I>\"It's not an optical illusion, it just looks like one\"</I> <NOBR>- Phil White</NOBR>");
addQuote(2, "<I>\"Polymer physicists are into chains\"</I> <NOBR>- Anonymous</NOBR>");
addQuote(2, "<I>\"God may be subtle, but He isn't plain mean\"</I> <NOBR>- Albert Einstein</NOBR>");
addQuote(2, "<I>\"God is the tangential point between zero and infinity\"</I> <NOBR>- Alfred Jarry</NOBR>");
addQuote(2, "<I>\"Only two things are infinite, the universe and human stupidity, and I'm not sure about the former\"</I> <NOBR>- Albert Einstein</NOBR>");
addQuote(2, "<I>\"The crux... is that the vast majority of the mass of the universe seems to be missing\"</I> <NOBR>- William J. Broad</NOBR>");
addQuote(2, "<I>\"We are an impossibility in an impossible universe\"</I> <NOBR>- Ray Bradbury</NOBR>");
addQuote(2, "<I>\"Research is what I'm doing when I don't know what I'm doing\"</I> <NOBR>- von Braun</NOBR>");
addQuote(2, "<I>\"Common sense is the collection of prejudices acquired by age 18\"</I> <NOBR>- Albert Einstein</NOBR>");
addQuote(2, "<I>\"I do not feel obliged to believe that the same God who has endowed us with sense, reason, and intellect has intended us to forgo their use\"</I> <NOBR>- Galileo Galilei</NOBR>");
addQuote(2, "<I>\"When you are courting a nice girl an hour seems like a second. When you sit on a red-hot cinder a second seems like an hour. That's relativity\"</I> <NOBR>- Albert Einstein</NOBR>");
addQuote(2, "<I>\"Imagine if there were no hypothetical situations...\"</I> <NOBR>- John Mendosa</NOBR>");
addQuote(2, "<I>\"If the facts don't fit the theory, change the facts\"</I> <NOBR>- Albert Einstein</NOBR>");
addQuote(2, "<I>\"I have not failed. I've just found 10,000 ways that won't work\"</I> <NOBR>- Thomas Edison</NOBR>");
addQuote(2, "<I>\"To invent, you need a good imagination and a pile of junk\"</I> <NOBR>- Thomas Edison</NOBR>");
addQuote(2, "<I>\"I would never die for my beliefs because I might be wrong\"</I> <NOBR>- Bertrand Russell</NOBR>");
addQuote(2, "<I>\"As far as the laws of mathematics refer to reality, they are not certain, and as far as they are certain, they do not refer to reality\"</I> <NOBR>- Albert Einstein</NOBR>");
addQuote(2, "<I>\"Logic is a systematic method of coming to the wrong conclusion with confidence\"</I> <NOBR>- Manly's Maxim</NOBR>");
addQuote(2, "<I>\"If A equals success, then the formula is: A = X + Y + Z, X is work. Y is play. Z is keep your mouth shut\"</I> <NOBR>- Albert Einstein</NOBR>");
addQuote(2, "<I>\"Chaos Theory is a new theory invented by scientists panicked by the thought that the public were beginning to understand the old ones\"</I> <NOBR>- Mike Barfield</NOBR>");
addQuote(2, "<I>\"Descended from the apes? Let us hope that it is not true. But if it is, let us pray that it may not become generally known\"</I> <NOBR>- FA Montagu</NOBR>");
addQuote(2, "<I>\"Anyone who is not shocked by Quantum Theory has not understood it\"</I> <NOBR>- Niels Bohr</NOBR>");
addQuote(2, "<I>\"Listen buddy, if I could tell you in a minute what I did, it wouldn't be worth the Nobel Prize\"</I> <NOBR>- Richard P. Feynman</NOBR>");
addQuote(2, "<I>\"Science is the belief in the Ignorance of Experts\"</I> <NOBR>- Richard P. Feynman</NOBR>");
addQuote(2, "<I>\"Science is the belief in the Ignorance of Experts\"</I> <NOBR>- Richard P. Feynman</NOBR>");
addQuote(2, "<I>\"All theoretical chemistry is really physics; and all theoretical chemists know it\"</I> <NOBR>- Richard P. Feynman</NOBR>");
addQuote(2, "<I>\"Physics is much too hard for physicists\"</I> <NOBR>- David Hilbert</NOBR>");
addQuote(2, "<I>\"So this propulsion thing isn't really getting us anywhere\"</I> <NOBR>- Dr. C O'Sullivan (NUI Maynooth)</NOBR>, explaining the need for bending space-time for interstelar fight");


//Computers
addCategory("Computers", 3);
addQuote(3, "<I>\"I cannot conceive that anybody will require multiplications at the rate of 40,000 or even 4,000 per hour ...\"</I> <NOBR>- F. H. Wales (1936)</NOBR>");
addQuote(3, "<I>\"The words 'community' and 'communication' have the same root. Wherever you put a communications network, you put a community as well\"</I> <NOBR>- Bruce Sterling - The Hacker Crackdown</NOBR>");
addQuote(3, "<I>\"That's the thing about people who think they hate computers.	What they really hate is lousy programmers\"</I> <NOBR>- Larry Niven and Jerry Pournelle in 'Oath of Fealty'</NOBR>");
addQuote(3, "<I>\"e-credibility: the non-guaranteeable likelihood that the electronic data you're seeing is genuine rather than somebody's made-up crap\"</I> <NOBR>- Karl Lehenbauer</NOBR>");
addQuote(3, "<I>\"To iterate is human, to recurse, divine\"</I><NOBR>- Anonymous</NOBR>");
addQuote(3, "<I>\"Programming today is a race between software engineers striving to build bigger and better idiot-proof programs, and the Universe trying to produce bigger and better idiots. So far, the Universe is winning\"</I><NOBR>- Rich Cook</NOBR>");
addQuote(3, "<I>\"We are on the verge: Today our program proved Fermat's next-to-last theorem\"</I> <NOBR>- Epigrams in Programming,</NOBR> ACM SIGPLAN Sept. 1982");
addQuote(3, "<I>\"MS-DOS: Just say 'no'\"</I> <NOBR>- David Yolt</NOBR>");
addQuote(3, "<I>\"Hardware: the parts of a computer that can be kicked\"</I> <NOBR>- Jeff Pesis</NOBR>");
addQuote(3, "<I>\"There are two major products that come out of Berkeley: LSD and UNIX. We don't believe this to be a coincidence\"</I> <NOBR>- Jeremy S. Anderson</NOBR>");
addQuote(3, "<I>\"The C Programming Language - A language which combines the flexibility of assembly language with the power of assembly language\"</I> <NOBR>- Anonymous</NOBR>");
addQuote(3, "<I>\"In the face of entropy and nothingness, you kind of have to pretend it's not there if you want to keep writing good code.\"</I> <NOBR>- Karl Lehenbauer</NOBR>");
addQuote(3, "<I>\"Maybe some things do improve with age, but no matter how long I wait, my Commodore 64 just won't run Windows 95\"</I> <NOBR>- Kevin Sullivan</NOBR>");
addQuote(3, "<I>\"UNIX is basically a simple operating system, but you have to be a genius to understand the simplicity\"</I> <NOBR>- Dennis Ritchie</NOBR>");
addQuote(3, "<I>\"I can assure you that data processing is a fad that won't last out the year\"</I> <NOBR>- Editor incharge of business books</NOBR>, Prentice Hall, 1976");
addQuote(3, "<I>\"But what .... is it good for?\"</I> <NOBR>- IBM Engineer</NOBR>, on the Micro Chip, 1978");
addQuote(3, "<I>\"640K ought to be enough for anyone\"</I> <NOBR>- Bill Gates</NOBR>, 1981");
addQuote(3, "<I>\"Computers in the future may wiegh no more than 1.5 Tons\"</I> <NOBR>- Popular Mechanics</NOBR>, 1949");
addQuote(3, "<I>\"I think there's a world market for maybe 5 computers\"</I> <NOBR>- Thoms Watson</NOBR>, IBM Chairman, 1943");
addQuote(3, "<I>\"There is no reason anyone would want a computer in their home\"</I> <NOBR>- Ken Olson</NOBR>, President of DIGITAL Equipment, 1977");
addQuote(3, "<I>\"The faults in bad  software can be so subtle as to be practically theological\"</I> <NOBR>- Bruce Sterling</NOBR>, The Hacker Crackdown");
addQuote(3, "<I>\"Nevertheless, computers still are profoundly brittle and stupid; they are simply vastly more subtle in their stupidity and brittleness\"</I> <NOBR>- Bruce Sterling</NOBR>, The Hacker Crackdown");
addQuote(3, "<I>\"The best software is that which has been tested by thousands of users under thousands of different conditions, over years.  It is then known as \"stable.\"  This does not mean that the software is now flawless, free of bugs.  It generally means that there are plenty of bugs in it, but the bugs are well-identified and fairly well understood\"</I> <NOBR>- Bruce Sterling</NOBR>, The Hacker Crackdown");
addQuote(3, "<I>\"Source code commentary is like sex. When it's good it's very, VERY, VERY good. And, when it's bad it's still better than nothing\"</I> <NOBR>- Anonymous</NOBR>");
addQuote(3, "<I>\"The day Microsoft makes something that doesn't suck, is probably the day Microsoft starts making vacuum cleaners\"</I> <NOBR>- Anonymous</NOBR>");
addQuote(3, "<I>\"But the possibility of abuse may be a good reason for leaving capabilities out of other computer languages, it's not a good reason for leaving capabilities out of Perl\"</I> <NOBR>- Larry Wall</NOBR>");
addQuote(3, "<I>\"UNIX is an operating system, OS/2 is half an operating system, Windows is a shell, and DOS is a boot partition virus\"</I> <NOBR>- Peter H Coffin</NOBR>");
addQuote(3, "<I>\"Confucius say: He who play in root, eventually kill tree\"</I> <NOBR>- Anonymous</NOBR>");
addQuote(3, "<I>\"C++ : Where friends have access to your private members\"</I> <NOBR>- Gavin Russell Baker</NOBR>");
addQuote(3, "<I>\"Error, no keyboard - press F1 to continue\"</I> <NOBR>- My BIOS</NOBR>");
addQuote(3, "<I>\"Real programmers don't write in BASIC. Actually, no programmers write in BASIC after reaching puberty\"</I> <NOBR>- Anonymous</NOBR>");
addQuote(3, "<I>\"A one-question geek test. If you get the joke, you're a geek: Seen on a California license plate on a VW Beetle: 'FEATURE'\"</I> <NOBR>- Joshua D. Wachs</NOBR>");
addQuote(3, "<I>\"Software suppliers are trying to make their software packages more user-friendly ... Their best approach, so far, has been to take all the old brochures, and stamp the words, 'user-friendly' on the cover\"</I> <NOBR>- Bill Gates</NOBR>");
addQuote(3, "<I>\"'Intel Inside': The world's most widely used warning label\"</I> <NOBR>- Jim Hopper</NOBR>");
addQuote(3, "<I>\'Our most reliable OS yet !<sup>*</sup>'<br>(<sup>*</sup>Based on total crashes since OS release)\"</I> <NOBR>- Microsoft disclaimer about WinXP</NOBR>");
addQuote(3, "<I>\If it wasn't for C, we would be programming in BASI, PASAL and OBOL\"</I> <NOBR>- Anonymous</NOBR>");



//Literary Greats
Quotes[4]=new Array();
catNames[4]="Literary Greats";
Quotes[4][0]  = "<I>\"I have never let my schooling interfere with my education\"</I> <NOBR>- Mark Twain</NOBR>";
Quotes[4][1]  = "<I>\"Whenever you find that you are on the side of the majority, it is time to pause and reflect\"</I> <NOBR>- Mark Twain</NOBR>";
Quotes[4][2]  = "<I>\"Of all the animals, man is the only one that is cruel. He is the only one that inflicts pain for the pleasure of doing it\"</I> <NOBR>- Mark Twain</NOBR>";
Quotes[4][3]  = "<I>\"All great truths begin as blasphemies\"</I> <NOBR>- George Bernard Shaw</NOBR>";
Quotes[4][4]  = "<I>\"The unspeakable hunting the uneatable\"</I> <NOBR>- Oscar Wilde on Fox Hunting</NOBR>";
Quotes[4][5]  = "<I>\"I have nothing to declare but my genius\"</I> <NOBR>- Oscar Wilde</NOBR>";
Quotes[4][6]  = "<I>\"Rumours of my death have been greatly exadurated\"</I> <NOBR>- Samuel Clements</NOBR>";
Quotes[4][7]  = "<I>\"A fool's brain digests philosophy into folly, science into superstition, and art into pedantry.  Hence University education\"</I> <NOBR>- George Bernard Shaw</NOBR>";
Quotes[4][8]  = "<I>\"In India, 'cold weather' is merely a conventional phrase and has come into use through the necessity of having some way to distinguish between weather which will melt a brass door-knob and weather which will only make it mushy\"</I> <NOBR>- Mark Twain</NOBR>";
Quotes[4][9]  = "<I>\"Talkers are no good doers\"</I> <NOBR>- William Shakespeare, Henry VI</NOBR>";
Quotes[4][10] = "<I>\"Man is the only animal that blushes - or needs to\"</I> <NOBR>- Mark Twain</NOBR>";
Quotes[4][11] = "<I>\"He hadn't a single redeeming vice\"</I> <NOBR>- Oscar Wilde</NOBR>";
Quotes[4][12] = "<I>\"The only thing to do with good advice is pass it on. It is never any use to oneself\"</I> <NOBR>- Oscar Wilde</NOBR>";
Quotes[4][13] = "<I>\"I was gratified to be able to answer promptly, and I did. I said I didn't know\"</I> <NOBR>- Mark Twain</NOBR>";
Quotes[4][14] = "<I>\"Clothes make the man. Naked people have little or no influence on society\"</I> <NOBR>- Mark Twain</NOBR>";
Quotes[4][15] = "<I>\"Cauliflower is nothing but Cabbage with a College Education\"</I> <NOBR>- Mark Twain</NOBR>";
Quotes[4][16] = "<I>\"The journey of a thousand leagues begins with a single step\"</I> <NOBR>- Lao Tzu</NOBR>";
Quotes[4][17] = "<I>\"God is a comedian playing to an audience too afraid to laugh\"</I> <NOBR>- Voltaire</NOBR>";
Quotes[4][18] = "<I>\"I'll defend to the death your right to say that, but I never said I'd listen to it!\"</I> <NOBR>- Tom Galloway</NOBR>, appologising to Voltaire";
Quotes[4][19] = "<I>\"Democracy is a device that insures we shall be governed no better than we deserve\"</I> <NOBR>- George Bernard Shaw</NOBR>";
Quotes[4][20] = "<I>\"Where prejudice exists it always discolors our thoughts\"</I> <NOBR>- Mark Twain</NOBR>";
Quotes[4][21] = "<I>\"A lie can travel halfway around the world while the truth is putting on its shoes\"</I> <NOBR>- Mark Twain</NOBR>";
Quotes[4][22] = "<I>\"There are lies, damned lies and statistics\"</I> <NOBR>- Mark Twain</NOBR>";
Quotes[4][23] = "<I>\"What would men be without women? Scarce, sir, mighty scarce\"</I> <NOBR>- Mark Twain</NOBR>";
Quotes[4][24] = "<I>\"Those who can do, those who can't teach\"</I> <NOBR>- George Bernard Shaw</NOBR>";

//Science Fiction
addCategory("Science Fiction", 5);
addQuote(5, "<I>\"Oh dear, I think you'll find reality's on the blink again\"</I><NOBR>-- Marvin The Paranoid Android</NOBR>");
addQuote(5, "<I>\"Never fear answers-- fear running out of questions\"</I> <NOBR>-- Ivanova, Babylon 5</NOBR>");
addQuote(5, "<I>\"To be different is not necessarily to be ugly; to have a different idea is not necessarily to be wrong. The worst possible thing that can happen to humanity is for all of us to begin to look and talk and act and think alike\"</I> <NOBR>- Gene Roddenberry</NOBR>");
addQuote(5, "<I>\"If the primates that we come from had known that someday the politicians would come out of the gene pool, they'd have stayed up in the trees and written evolution off as a bad idea\"</I> <NOBR>- Captain John Sheridan, Babylon 5</NOBR>");
addQuote(5, "<I>\"Star Trekers alone can make the difference between a future in which mankind will fall back into a dark age that will last a thousand years, and one in which we will all go upward, outward to the stars\"</I> <NOBR>- Robert Heinlein.</NOBR>");
addQuote(5, "<I>\"Why the Enterprise can't cloak: (1) Starfleet doesn't sneak around; (2) Two cloaked ships wouldn't show up well on TV - really dull; (3) Starfleet doesn't have the correct technobabble to do it\"</I> <NOBR>- Rick Sternbach</NOBR>");
addQuote(5, "<I>\"How did I get the part of O'Brien? Well, I wrote a check to this guy for about... no, I auditioned for it, of course!\"</I> <NOBR>- Colm Meany</NOBR>");
addQuote(5, "<I>\"Once you have their money, you never give it back\"</I> <NOBR>- 1st Ferengi rule of acquisition</NOBR>");
addQuote(5, "<I>\"You see, it's like I've always said: 'You can get more with a kind word and a two-by-four than you can with just a kind word'\"</I><NOBR>- Marcus to Lennier in Babylon 5:</NOBR> \"Ceremonies of Light and Dark\"");
addQuote(5, "<I>\"Imagination is the one weapon in the war against reality\"</I><NOBR>- Jules de Gaultier</NOBR>");
addQuote(5, "<I>\"Duct tape is like the Force. It has a light side, a dark side, and it holds the universe together...\"</I><NOBR>- Carl Zwanzig</NOBR>");
addQuote(5, "<I>\"There is a theory which states that if ever anybody discovers exactly what the Universe is for and why it is here, it will instantly disappear and be replaced by something even more bizarre and inexplicable. There is another theory which states that this has already happened\"</I><NOBR>- Douglas Adams</NOBR>");
addQuote(5, "<I>\"In the beginning the Universe was created. This has made a lot of people very angry and been widely regarded as a bad move\"</I><NOBR>- Douglas Adams</NOBR>");
addQuote(5, "<I>\"The surest sign that intelligent life exists elsewhere in the universe is that it has never tried to contact us\"</I><NOBR>- Calvin and Hobbes (Bill Watterson)</NOBR>");
addQuote(5, "<I>\"It may be that our role on this planet is not to worship God but to create him\"</I> <NOBR>- Arthur C. Clarke</NOBR>");
addQuote(5, "<I>\"Isn't it interesting that the same people who laugh at science fiction listen to weather forecasts and economists?\"</I> <NOBR>- Kelvin Throop III</NOBR>");
addQuote(5, "<I>\"Human beings, who are almost unique in having the ability to learn from the experience of others, are also remarkable for their apparent disinclination to do so\"</I> <NOBR>- Douglas Adams</NOBR>");
addQuote(5, "<I>\"The essential uselessness of computers is often masked by the sense of achievement you get from getting them to work at all\"</I> <NOBR>- Douglas Adams</NOBR>");
addQuote(5, "<I>\"Small print leads to large risk\"</I> <NOBR>- 8<sup>th</sup> Ferengi Rule of Acuasition</NOBR>");
addQuote(5, "<I>\"Satisfaction is not guaranteed\"</I> <NOBR>- 19<sup>th</sup> Ferengi Rule of Acuasition</NOBR>");
addQuote(5, "<I>\"No good deed goes unpunished\"</I> <NOBR>- 285<sup>th</sup> Ferengi Rule of Acuasition</NOBR>");



//Political Quotes
addCategory("Politics", 6);
addQuote(6, "<I>\"Giving money and power to government is like giving whiskey and car keys to teenage boys\"</I> <NOBR>- P J O'Rourke</NOBR>");
addQuote(6, "<I>\"Any system of government will work when everything is going well. It's the system that functions in the pinches that survives.\"</I> <NOBR>- John Fitzgerald Kennedy</NOBR>");
addQuote(6, "<I>\"I have a dream that my four children will one day live in a nation where they will not be judged by the color of their skin but by the content of their character\"</I> <NOBR>- Martin Luther King, Jr.</NOBR>");
addQuote(6, "<I>\"There never was a good war or a bad peace\"</I> <NOBR>- Benjamin Franklin</NOBR>");
addQuote(6, "<I>\"A fanatic is a person who can't change his mind and won't change the subject\"</I> <NOBR>- Winston Churchill</NOBR>");
addQuote(6, "<I>\"When I am abroad I always make it a rule never to criticise or attack the Government of my country. I make up for lost time when I am at home\"</I> <NOBR>- Winston Churchill</NOBR>");
addQuote(6, "<I>\"What could you hope to achieve except to be sunk in a bigger and more expensive ship this time\"</I> <NOBR>- Winston Churchill,</NOBR> to Admiral Mountbatten");
addQuote(6, "<I>\"Those who do not do politics will be done in by politics\"</I> <NOBR>- French Proverb</NOBR>");
addQuote(6, "<I>\"Whenever I hear anyone arguing for slavery, I feel a strong impulse to see it tried on him personally\"</I> <NOBR>- Abraham Lincoln</NOBR>");
addQuote(6, "<I>\"If you cannot convince them, confuse them\"</I> <NOBR>- Harry S Truman</NOBR>");
addQuote(6, "<I>\"Be polite to all, but intimate with few\"</I> <NOBR>- Thomas Jefferson</NOBR>");
addQuote(6, "<I>\"Don't worry about people stealing your ideas. If your ideas are any good, you'll have to ram them down people's throats\"</I> <NOBR>- Howard Aiken</NOBR>");
addQuote(6, "<I>\"Man and nations will act rationally when all other possibilities have been exhausted\"</I> <NOBR>- Katz' Law</NOBR>");
addQuote(6, "<I>\"If an idea can survive a bureaucratic review and be implemented it wasn't worth doing\"</I> <NOBR>- Mollison's Bureaucracy Hypothesis</NOBR>");
addQuote(6, "<I>\"In those days he was wiser than he is now -- he used to frequently take my advice\"</I> <NOBR>- Winston Churchill</NOBR>");
addQuote(6, "<I>\"Those who make peaceful revolution impossible will make violent revolution inevitable\"</I> <NOBR>- John F Kennedy</NOBR>");
addQuote(6, "<I>\"In defeat, unbeatable; in victory, unbearable\"</I> <NOBR>- Winston Churchill,</NOBR> on General Montgomery");
addQuote(6, "<I>\"A countryman between two lawyers is like a fish between two cats\"</I> <NOBR>- Benjamin Franklin</NOBR>");
addQuote(6, "<I>\"I looked up the word 'politics' in the dictionary and it's actually a combination of two words, 'poli' which means 'many' and 'tics' which means 'bloodsuckers'!\"</I> <NOBR>- Jay Leno</NOBR>");
addQuote(6, "<I>\"I was a pilot flying an airplane and it just so happened that where I was flying made what I was doing spying\"</I> <NOBR>- Francis Gary Power,</NOBR> U-2 reconnaissance pilot held by the Soviets for spying");
addQuote(6, "<I>\"Sure, it's going to kill a lot of people, but they may be dying of something else anyway\"</I> <NOBR>- Othal Brand,</NOBR> member of a Texas pesticide review board, on chlordane");
addQuote(6, "<I>\"Rotarians, be patriotic! Learn to shoot yourself\"</I> <NOBR>- Chicago Rotary Club journal, 'Gyrator'</NOBR>");
addQuote(6, "<I>\"I've always thought that underpopulated countries in Africa are vastly underpolluted\"</I> <NOBR>- Lawrence Summers,</NOBR> chief economist of the World Bank, explaining why we should export toxic wastes to Third World countries");
addQuote(6, "<I>\"In American politics you ask the rich for money and the poor for votes and expect them both to believe you\"</I> <NOBR>- Abraham Lincoln</NOBR>");
addQuote(6, "<I>\"Never interrupt your enemy when he is making a mistake\"</I> <NOBR>- Napoleon Bonaparte</NOBR>");
addQuote(6, "<I>\"I can picture in my mind a world without war, a world without hate. And I can picture us attacking that world, because they'd never expect it\"</I> <NOBR>- Jack Handey, \"Deep Thoughts\"</NOBR>");
addQuote(6, "<I>\"The job of a citizen is to keep his mouth open\"</I> <NOBR>- Baroness Thatcher</NOBR>");
addQuote(6, "<I>\"Some men see things as they are and say 'why?' I dream things that never were and say 'why not?'\"</I> <NOBR>- Robert F. Kennedy</NOBR>");
addQuote(6, "<I>\"Attila the Hen\"</I> <NOBR>- Clement Freud on Margaret Thatcher</NOBR>");
addQuote(6, "<B>Bessie Braddock:</B><I>\"Winston, your drunk!\"</I><BR><B>Winston Churchill:</B> <I>\"Bessie, your ugly, and tomorrow morning I shall be sober\"</I>");
addQuote(6, "<I>\"Americans have different ways of saying things. They say 'elevator', we say 'lift' ... they say 'President', we say 'stupid psychopathic git'\"</I> <NOBR>- Alexai Sayle</NOBR>");
addQuote(6, "<I>\"You'll notice that Nancy Reagan never drinks water when Ronnie speaks\"</I> <NOBR>- Robin Williams</NOBR>");
addQuote(6, "<I>\"A committee is a group of people who individually can do nothing but together can decide that nothing can be done\"</I> <NOBR>- Fred Allen</NOBR>");
addQuote(6, "<I>\"If the word 'No' was removed from the English language, Ian Paisley would be speechless\"</I> <NOBR>- John Hume</NOBR>");
addQuote(6, "<I>\"The draft is white people sending black people to fight yellow people to protect the country they stole from red people\"</I> <NOBR>- James Rado</NOBR>");
addQuote(6, "<I>\"The most terrifying words in the English langauge are: 'I'm from the government and I'm here to help'\"</I> <NOBR>- Ronald Reagan</NOBR>");
addQuote(6, "<I>\"Democracy is a form of religion. It is the worship of jakals by jackasses\"</I> <NOBR>- H.L. mencken</NOBR>");

//The Idiots We Elect
addCategory("Elected Idiots", 7);
addQuote(7, "<I>\"I would have to ask the questioner. I haven't had a chance to ask the questioners the question they've been questioning\"</I> <NOBR>- George W Bush</NOBR>");
addQuote(7, "<I>\"Dick Cheney and I do not want this nation to be in a recession. We want anybody who can find work to be able to find work\"</I> <NOBR>- George W Bush</NOBR>");
addQuote(7, "<I>\"If we don't suceed, we run the risk of failure\"</I> <NOBR>- George W Bush</NOBR>");
addQuote(7, "<I>\"I believe we are on an irreversible trend toward more freedom and democracy-but that could change\"</I> <NOBR>- George W Bush</NOBR>");
addQuote(7, "<I>\"It's time for the human race to enter the solar system\"</I> <NOBR>- George W Bush</NOBR>");
addQuote(7, "<I>\"I stand by all the misstatements that I've made\"</I> <NOBR>- George W Bush</NOBR>");
addQuote(7, "<I>\"For NASA, space is still a high priority\"</I> <NOBR>- George W Bush</NOBR>");
addQuote(7, "<I>\"Please don't look at the part of the glass that is only half full\"</I> <NOBR>- George Bush (Snr.)</NOBR>");
addQuote(7, "<I>\"I don't want to just sit here blaming Congress. I mean, we're all in this together\"</I> <BR>- George Bush (Snr.) 11/20/91 to news anchor Bill Stuart of KCNC-TV, Denver<BR><I>\"I think the Congress should be blamed\"<\I><BR> - several minutes later, to Warner Saunders of WMAQ-TV, Chicago");
addQuote(7, "<I>\"We must go forward. Going Back is not an option, but we can go back if we have to\"</I> <NOBR>- George W Bush on NASA</NOBR>");
addQuote(7, "<I>\"Rarely is the question asked: Is our children learning\"</I> <NOBR>- George W Bush</NOBR>");
addQuote(7, "<I>\"It's clearly a budget. It's got a lot of numbers in it\"</I> <NOBR>- George W Bush</NOBR>");
addQuote(7, "<I>\"One word sums up probably the responsibility of any Governor, and that one word is 'to be prepared'\"</I> <NOBR>- George W Bush</NOBR>");
addQuote(7, "<I>\"If you're sick and tired of the politics of cynicism and polls and principles, come and join this campaign\"</I> <NOBR>- George W Bush</NOBR>");
addQuote(7, "<I>\"The most important job is not to be Governor, or First Lady in my case\"</I> <NOBR>- George W Bush</NOBR>");
addQuote(7, "<I>\"I think you'll agree with me on this one, the past is over\"</I> <NOBR>- George W Bush on a Talk Show</NOBR>");
addQuote(7, "<I>\"The Internet is a great way to get on the net\"</I> <NOBR>- Senator Bob Dole</NOBR>");
addQuote(7, "<I>\"I was recently on a tour of Latin America, and the only regret I have was that I didn't study Latin harder in school so I could converse with those people\"</I> <NOBR>- Dan Quayle</NOBR>");
addQuote(7, "<I>\"I have opinions of my own - strong opinions - but I don\'t always agree with them\"</I> <NOBR>- George W. Bush</NOBR>");
addQuote(7, "<I>\"Maternity pay? Now every Tom, Dick and Harry will get pregnant\"</I> <NOBR>- Malcolm Smith</NOBR>");
addQuote(7, "<I>\"I haven't committed a crime. What I did was fail to comply with the law\"</I> <NOBR>- David Dinkins, New York City Mayor,</NOBR> answering accusations that he failed to pay his taxes");
addQuote(7, "<I>\"I was under medication when I made the decision not to burn the tapes\"</I> <NOBR>- President Richard Nixon</NOBR>");
addQuote(7, "<I>\"I've noticed that everyone who is for abortion has already been born\"</I> <NOBR>- Ronald Reagan</NOBR>");


//Personal Quotes
addCategory("Me & My Friends", 8);
addQuote(8, "<I>\"Peter, I can see Uranus\"</I> <NOBR>- Pauric Coyle (Amature Astronomer)</NOBR>");
addQuote(8, "<I>\"We must be travelling at light speed because time seems to be standing still\"</I> <NOBR>- Me (in a particularly boring Physics Lecture)</NOBR>");
addQuote(8, "<I>\"It's about as stable as a Russian airliner flying through a tornado with a well tanked up pilot\"</I> <NOBR>- Me</NOBR>");
temp  = "<I>\"It Could be worse, it could be ";
	var rightnow=new Date();
	temp+=toTextDay(rightnow.getDay());
	temp += "...oh wait it is!!\"</I> <NOBR>- Siobhan McKenna</NOBR>";
addQuote(8, temp);
addQuote(8, "<I>\"That bar looks a bit shakey to me...I'd better prop it up for the night\"</I> <NOBR>- Peter Mulligan</NOBR> (At the Clubs & Socs Awards 2001)");
addQuote(8, "<I>\"Life's a glitch and then you die\"</I> <NOBR>- Vishal Vatsa</NOBR>");
addQuote(8, "<I>\"See, even trees can learn .... pitty about americans!!\"</I> <NOBR>- Gareth Kavanagh</NOBR>");
addQuote(8, "<I>\"I'm in the protection racket now ... Condoms, Femidoms, the Pill, etc.\"</I> <NOBR>- Peter Mulligan</NOBR>");
addQuote(8, "<I><XMP><NOTE TARGET=\"SELF\"> - must study - </NOTE></XMP></I> <NOBR>- Gareth Kavanagh's new Pseudo HTML Tag</NOBR>");
addQuote(8, "<I>\" Noel Hogan was a very good president and he worked very hard ... I have to be the opposite to him\"</I> <NOBR>- Seaghan Kearney (President Elect NUIM SU)</NOBR> in the Source");
addQuote(8, "<I>\"Homogeneous means a gay scientist\"</I> <NOBR>- Rob McKenna</NOBR>");
addQuote(8, "<I>\"That was a joke, it wasn't meant to be funny\"</I> <NOBR>- Dave Barrett,</NOBR> President of MiNDS>");
addQuote(8, "<I>\"There has to be an external port on this post office some where\"</I> <NOBR>- Dave Barret,</NOBR> trying to post a letter when the post office was closed");
addQuote(8, "<I>\"Do you honestly expect *ME* to know what *I'M* talking about?  Prfft... \"</I> <NOBR>- Dave Barret,</NOBR> President of MiNDS>");
addQuote(8, "<I>\"It's not a ticket from Monopoly. That's get out of jail free you're thinking of. And they do work, if you laminate it and embed a blade in one edge. Particullarly if they have those locks that can be opened by any credit card, which seem to be present in most high-security insitutions according to my television \"</I> <NOBR>- Dave Barret,</NOBR> President of MiNDS>");
addQuote(8, "<I>\"There is nothing less common than common sense\"</I> <NOBR>- Wing</NOBR>");
addQuote(8, "<I>\"I've wasted my life on backslashes and semi-colons\"</I> <NOBR>- James Cotter</NOBR>, Sys Admin");
addQuote(8, "<I>\"The Word 'Standard' is anything but standard when it comes to anything to do with Web Design\"</I> <NOBR>- Me</NOBR>");
addQuote(8, "<I>\"I am the king of trivia\, look at my trivialness\"</I> <NOBR>- Gareth Kavanagh</NOBR>");
addQuote(8, "<I>\"I expected to see his leg fly off with that shot because you'd have to have Leprosy to miss that shot!\"</I> <NOBR>- Peter Mulligan,</NOBR> watching the All Ireland Final 2001");
addQuote(8, "<I>\"The opinions of those that do not matter to me, do not matter to me\"</I> <NOBR>- Wing</NOBR>");
addQuote(8, "<I>\"Go to the gutter, dig six feet under, another thirty for good measure and you might find my mind coimming up for air\"</I> <NOBR>- Wing</NOBR>");
addQuote(8, "<I>\"When we want your opinion we'll give it to you\"</I> <NOBR>- Wing</NOBR>, to Rory Tynan");
addQuote(8, "<I>\"But ... he makes cheap look good\"</I> <NOBR>- Bren</NOBR>, to Tony about Oscar");
addQuote(8, "<I>\"If that's your reaction I'd hate to see what would happen if I insulted you\"</I> <NOBR>- Niall Kelly</NOBR>, to Elaine");
addQuote(8, "<I>\"And if it weren't so bloody cold ... I'd take off my clothes and run up the street naked shouting Eureka\"</I> <NOBR>- Shane</NOBR>, about Elaines 'Magic Lead'");
addQuote(8, "<I>\"What is it about a black hole that makes it so powerfull? It's denser than George W.\"</I> <NOBR>- Niall Kelly</NOBR>");
addQuote(8, "<I>\"Harry Potter - A young Peter Gaughran\"</I> <NOBR>- Vincent Timoney</NOBR>");
addQuote(8, "<I>\"The Cobble Stones were a demanding Mistress\"</I> <NOBR>- Vincent Timoney</NOBR>");
addQuote(8, "<I>\"(to the Tune of \'Fairy Tale in New York\')They got lethal Bananas, they got bombs from the sky, the Moles they explode and the scheep they can fly\"</I> <NOBR>- Sean O'Dwyer</NOBR> about Worms Armagedon");
addQuote(8, "<I>\"I remove all bad puns from my memory - I can't remember 10 James Bond films\"</I> <NOBR>- Dave McNally</NOBR>");
addQuote(8, "<I>\"My parents will sue the pants off you!\"</I> <NOBR>- Micheal Geary</NOBR>");
addQuote(8, "<I>\"Because, in my own personal opinion, and with the provision that this is not a statement of fact and should not be taken as one, and that this opinion may not be used as a basis for in argument for or against the above mentioned individual, Michael Geary is an absolute spanner.\"</I> <NOBR>- Commie Dave</NOBR>");
addQuote(8, "<I>\"[JK] has a tendency to offer one line solutions to twenty line problems\"</I> <NOBR>- Des Traynor</NOBR>");


//Sport Music & Show Biz Quotes
addCategory("Celebreties", 9);
addQuote(9, "<I>\"Women might be able to fake orgasms. But men can fake whole relationships\"</I> <NOBR>- Sharon Stone</NOBR>");
addQuote(9, "<I>\"Honesty is the key to a relationship. If you can fake that, you’re in\"</I> <NOBR>- Courtney Cox</NOBR>");
addQuote(9, "<I>\"My mother never saw the irony in calling me a son-of-a-bitch\"</I> <NOBR>- Jack Nicholson</NOBR>");
addQuote(9, "<I>\"Ah, yes, divorce...from the Latin word meaning to rip out a man’s genitals through his wallet\"</I> <NOBR>- Robin Williams</NOBR>");
addQuote(9, "<I>\"There’s a new medical crisis. Doctors are reporting that many men are having allergic reactions to latex condoms. They say they cause severe swelling. So what’s the problem?\"</I> <NOBR>- Dustin Hoffman</NOBR>");
addQuote(9, "<I>\"Instead of getting married again, I’m going to find a woman I don’t like and just give her a house\"</I> <NOBR>- Rod Stewart</NOBR>");
addQuote(9, "<I>\"See, the problem is that God gives men a brain and a penis, and only enough blood to run one at a time\"</I> <NOBR>- Robin Williams</NOBR>");
addQuote(9, "<I>\"Let's do like one shepherd said to the other......and get the flock outta here\"</I> <NOBR>- Riggs (Mel Gibson) in Lethal Weapon</NOBR>");
addQuote(9, "<I>\"Smoking kills. If you're killed, you've lost a very important part of your life\"</I> <NOBR>- Brooke Shields,</NOBR> during an interview to become spokesperson for a federal anti-smoking campaign");
addQuote(9, "<I>\"It's a small world, but I wouldn't want to have to paint it\"</I> <NOBR>- Steven Wright</NOBR>");
addQuote(9, "<I>\"Right now I'm having amnesia and deja vu at the same time. I think I've forgotten this before\"</I> <NOBR>- Steven Wright</NOBR>");
addQuote(9, "<I>\"I was playing poker the other night... with Tarot cards. I got a full house and 4 people died\"</I> <NOBR>- Steven Wright</NOBR>");
addQuote(9, "<I>\"I could dance till the cows come home.  On second thought, I'd rather dance with the cows till you come home\"</I> <NOBR>- Groucho Marx</NOBR>");
addQuote(9, "<I>\"A friend in need's a friend in deed a friend with weed is better, a friend with breasts and all the rest, a friend who's dressed in leather\"</I> <NOBR>- Placebo, Pure Morning</NOBR>");
addQuote(9, "<I>\"People think I'm insane because I am frowning all the time\"</I> <NOBR>- Black Sabbath, Paranoid</NOBR>");
addQuote(9, "<I>\"I want to lap it up and swim in it until I drown my moral standing is lying down\"</I> <NOBR>- Trent Reznor, the only time</NOBR>");
addQuote(9, "<I>\"I don't know anything about music. In my line you don't have to\"</I> <NOBR>- Elvis Presley</NOBR>");
addQuote(9, "<I>\"Given the choice between accomplishing something and just lying around, I'd rather lie around.  No contest\"</I> <NOBR>- Eric Clapton</NOBR>");
addQuote(9, "<I>\"Luge strategy? Lie flat and try not to die\"</I> <NOBR>- Carmen Boyle</NOBR> <NOBR>(Olympic Luge Gold Medal winner 1996)</NOBR>");
addQuote(9, "<I>\"Hockey is a sport for white men. Basketball is a sport for black men. Golf is a sport for white men dressed like black pimps\"</I> <NOBR>- Tiger Woods</NOBR>");
addQuote(9, "<I>\"I've never had major knee surgery on any other part of my body\"</I> <NOBR>- Winston Bennett,</NOBR> University of Kentucky basketball forward");
addQuote(9, "<I>\"The doctors X-rayed my head and found nothing\"</I> <NOBR>- Dizzy Dean,</NOBR> explaining how he felt after being hit on the head by a ball in the 1934 World Series.");
addQuote(9, "<I>\"We've all been blessed with God-given talents. Mine just happens to be beating people up\"</I> <NOBR>- Sugar Ray Leonard</NOBR>");
addQuote(9, "<I>\"These tyres are called wets, because they're used in the wet. And these tyres are called slicks, because they're very slick\"</I> <NOBR>- Murray Walker</NOBR>");
addQuote(9, "<I>\"Why do they call it rush hour with nothing moves?\"</I> <NOBR>- Robin Williams</NOBR>");
addQuote(9, "<I>\"If we are a country committed to free speech, then why do we have phone bills?\"</I> <NOBR>- Steven Wright</NOBR>");
addQuote(9, "<I>\"You know, somebody actually complimented me on my driving today. They left a little note on the windscreen which said, 'Parking Fine.'\"</I> <NOBR>- Tommy Cooper</NOBR>");
addQuote(9, "<I>\"A fellow with the inventiveness of Albert Einstein but with the attention span of Daffy Duck\"</I> <NOBR>- Tom Shales talking about Robin Williams</NOBR>");
addQuote(9, "<I>\"What makes him think a middle aged actor, who's played with a chimp, could have a future in politics?\"</I> <NOBR>- Ronald Reagan</NOBR> commenting on Eastwood's bid to become mayor of Carmel");
addQuote(9, "<I>\"A verbal contract isn't worth the paper it's written on\"</I> <NOBR>- Samuel Goldwyn</NOBR>");
addQuote(9, "<I>\"When did I realize I was God? Well, I was praying and I suddenly realized I was talking to myself\"</I> <NOBR>- Peter O'Toole</NOBR>");
addQuote(9, "<I>\"Life doesn't imitate art, it imitates bad television\"</I> <NOBR>- Woody Allen</NOBR>");
addQuote(9, "<I>\"Television: A medium. So called because it's neither rare nor well done\"</I> <NOBR>- Ernie Kovacs</NOBR>");
addQuote(9, "<I>\"Most rock journalism is people who can't write interviewing people who can't talk for people who can't read\"</I> <NOBR>- Frank Zappa</NOBR>");
addQuote(9, "<I>\"All music if folk music. I ain't never heard no horse sing a song\"</I> <NOBR>- Louis Armstrong</NOBR>");
addQuote(9, "<I>\"Once you're dead you're made for life\"</I> <NOBR>- Jimi Hendrix</NOBR>");
addQuote(9, "<I>\"He ain't just got a few grasses, Rodney. He's got a whole lawn\"</I> <NOBR>- Delboy, on a Policeman</NOBR>");
addQuote(9, "<I>\"Rodney's taste in women is terrible. He's had more dogs than crufts\"</I> <NOBR>- Delboy, on Rodney</NOBR>");
addQuote(9, "<I>\"Well he was a wally brain, weren't he? Took him two years to paint a ceiling\"</I> <NOBR>- Delboy, on Michelangelo</NOBR>");
addQuote(9, "<I>\"I've known epidemics to come and go quicker than you\"</I> <NOBR>- Delboy</NOBR>");
addQuote(9, "<I>\"Greece? Horrible place. The mosquitoes were so big they showed up on radar\"</I> <NOBR>- Delboy</NOBR>");
addQuote(9, "<I>\"As MacBeth said to Hamlet in \"A Midsummer Night's Dream\", we've been done up like a couple of kippers\"</I> <NOBR>- Delboy</NOBR>");
addQuote(9, "<I>\"The word 'genius' isn't applicable in American football. A genius is a guy like Norman Einstein\"</I> <NOBR>- Joe Theisman,</NOBR> quarterback and sports analyst");
addQuote(9, "<I>\"I'm not into black magic. The only thing I've ever conjured up as a fart in the morning in bed\"</I> <NOBR>- Ozzy Ozbourne</NOBR>");
addQuote(9, "<I>\"The lead car is absolutely unique, except for the one behind it which is identical\"</I> <NOBR>- Murray Walker</NOBR>");
addQuote(9, "<I>\"If history repeats itself, I should think we can expect the same thing again\"</I> <NOBR>- Terry Venables</NOBR>");
addQuote(9, "<I>\"I would not say that David Ginola is the best left winger in the Premiership, but there are none better\"</I> <NOBR>- Ron Atkinson</NOBR>");
addQuote(9, "<I>\"We are going to turn this team round 360 degrees\"</I> <NOBR>- Jason Kidd</NOBR>, when joining the Dallas Mavericks");

//Helper functions
function toTextDay(n){
	var temp;
	if(n==1) temp="Monday";
	if(n==2) temp="Tuesday";
	if(n==3) temp="Wednesday";
	if(n==4) temp="Thursday";
	if(n==5) temp="Friday";
	if(n==6) temp="Saturday";
	if(n==0) temp="Sunday";

	return temp;
}

// </XMP>